


sunshine after the rain

by starries



Category: GOT7
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Pining, a small amount of bady written angst, excessive amounts of comparing jackson to the sun, lapslock, this is a mess of a story i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-06-01 13:44:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6522172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starries/pseuds/starries
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>in which jackson is made of sunshine and needs to be protected and loved and jaebum does just that</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> a story with each chapter based off or inspired by lyrics from got7’s “fly” (though the lyrics may not be in order since i rearranged them and put some together to fit the story more.)
> 
> also beware jackson is compared to the sun like at least 3 times each chapter and jaebum is a lovestruck pining mess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jaebum accepts he’s more than a little attracted to their team’s hong kong member, who always overflowing with positivity and seems to be made of sunshine, jackson wang, a bit too late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just wanted to get at least the first chapter out before fly promotions end though i think they ended today so

_i just wanna be with you,_

_i just wanna be with you_

 

 

jaebum accepts he’s more than a little attracted to their team’s hong kong member, who always overflowing with positivity and seems to be made of sunshine, jackson wang, a bit too late.

 

not late in a way, but much later than he should have realized, laying in bed on night and the realization that he’s had a crush (and something much more than that now) on the younger since probably debut or maybe even earlier. it makes all remnants of sleep leave him and jaebum knows there's no way in hell he's going to be able to go back to sleep tonight. 

 

he has to turn over and stop himself from yelling in the middle of the night and waking youngjae up. he tries to sleep even though he knows he won't be able to, because then he won’t have to think about the belated realization of his crush and because they have a schedule tomorrow and he really needs some sleep.

 

needless to say after his revelation, he doesn’t get much sleep after, tossing and turning.

 

and when jackson, the always caring member, asks about his dark circles and why he seems so tired, jaebum mumbles a half-assed excuse and throws a small glare (not a full on one because he always had a soft spot for the blonde even before he realized his crush) thinking, _this is your fault idiot_ , before the members all pile into the car and head off, the question forgotten.

 

jaebum tries to ignore jackson’s bright, high-pitched laugh from behind him when the maknaes tell some joke to jackson. instead jaebum focuses on whatever's on his phone and tries not to listen to jackson’s excited voice talking because, _god who has this much energy at 7 in the morning_ , and also because jaebum enjoys listening to jackson more than he’d like to admit.

 

he misses the concerned looks jackson shoots jaebum once in a while from the rear-view mirror.

 

+

 

jaebum tries not to stare at jackson too long during the interview and tries not to lean just a bit closer whenever the other places a hand on jaebum’s thigh or drapes an arm on his shoulder. he tries not to be _too_ aware of jackson's presense, but he quickly fails as he finds himself always paying just a bit more attention whenever jackson's talking or always hears his laugh the loudest among the others.  he hates it and jaebum tries not to let himself linger too much whenever he gives the fencer a friendly pat on the back or touches his knee.

 

jaebum knows jackson’s touches probably mean nothing, seeing him act the same with the other members, but when he catches the rapper staring at him for a bit longer than necessary before quickly turning away when they make that split second of eye contact or when his touch lingers for just a moment too long to be considered purely friendly, jaebum can't do anything to stop the seed of hope that plants intself in his heart, a natural thing everyone daydreams about when they have a crush.

 

so he lets it stay there, just tries to makes sure it doesn't grow into anything more. key word "tries".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next chapters will probably come out pretty quick since i already wrote most of the story and just need to reread and edit but it all depends if i feel like i'm motivated enough and not being a lazy ass


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jaebum, though, has noticed throughout the years of knowing jackson, that jackson isn’t as open about himself and doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve as other would think. that he's a lot more insecure and sensitive than he let's on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jackson and jaebum (jackson especially) might become a bit ooc and some things maybe exaggerated from here on out since it's a self indulgent fic but i hope you enjoy this story anyways!

_why are you so afraid to be loved,_

_i am right by your side what are you afraid of_

 

 

jackson is an immensely affectionate person, always draping himself over the person next to him or holding hands with the people around him.

 

many people, including jaebum, have gotten used to it, whether they like it or not and jaebum is never surprised whenever jackson puts an arm over his shoulder or when he clings to him (in fact, jaebum loves it, but that's only for him to know).

 

jaebum, though, has noticed throughout the years of knowing jackson, that jackson isn’t as open about himself and doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve as other would think. that he's a lot more insecure and sensitive than he lets on.

 

he’s guarded. not closed off per se, far from it, but jaebum notices it in the way jackson changes the topic when the question gets too personal and hits too close to home and in the way he shrinks back when he thinks he’s said too much, being too loud, and people call him out for it. in the way a comment affects him more than he shows, smile a little too tight and voice a bit strained when he tries to laugh it off.

 

jaebum knows that everyone has secrets and things they want to hide so it shouldn’t be a surprise. but it _is_. and jaebum doesn’t know why it is. maybe because jackson puts up such a good front he forgets sometimes.

 

sometimes jackson acts distant and it throws jaebum and the other members off. a lot. none of them are used to jackson doing that, the latter usually being so open and _over_ sharing if anything _._

 

during the times where jackson is quiet, attention only on his phone or thoughts, barely speaking or even not at all, the atmosphere turns awkward. not because the other members can't converse among themselves, but it's more like there's a constant in their lives missing, the voice that always brightens the mood, the one they've all learned to have in their lives gone, and they aren't quite sure to handle it, always casting worried glances at jackson while they talk.

 

everything feels quieter to jaebum whenever jackson doesn't talk. not literally because the other members can easily fill up the quiet hole jackson occasionally leaves, with their own energy. but jaebum always find himself more attuned to the blonde's voice, unconsciously searching for it or just _noticing_ it more and it somehow comforts him in a way when he finds it among the many others.

 

so whenever it's gone jaebum feels something small and uncomfortable grow in his chest and slowly push against his ribcage, making him want to squirm.

 

he always wants to go to jackson and pull him into a hug, whispering that he’s amazing and perfect just the way he is, that jaebum loves him for just him. but he can't, especially at the times where jackson closes himself off so much to the point where he flinches whenever jaebum wraps an arm around his shoulder, making jaebum pull off.

 

jaebum just wants jackson to know that jaebum _cares_ , that he doesn't have to wallow in his insecurities alone, that jaebum is more than willing to reassure him that he’s enough, _more_ than enough.

 

he tries. but jaebum can't risk conveying this without possibly accidently saying too much and the other never listens, always making self deprecating jokes, no matter what the members say and jaebum just wants him to _know_. he just doesn’t know how to tell him properly without other feelings bleeding through.

 

but what jaebum does know, what he figures out, is that along with that tiny seed of hope that was planted in his heart before, the one he desperately tried to stop, there was another thing that planted itself in jaebum’s heart along with that hope.

 

something jaebum didn’t notice quick enough to try and stomp down, letting it grow out of control, deeply rooting itself in jaebum's heart and blooming countless flowers ( _or,_ jaebum thinks secretly, _it’s always been there, long before the hope was there, growing steadily on its own_ ).

 

it was love. the small crush jaebum thought he had somewhat under control and something he could ignore was something so, _so_ much more and bigger than it seemed to be and jaebum doesn’t know what to do with it.

 

doesn’t know what to do when he goes breathless when jackson lets out a laugh and a bright smile. doesn’t know what to do when his heart skips a beat when jackson leans in closer to jaebum.

 

doesn’t know what to do when he wants to pull jackson in and kiss him breathless and hold him tight and run his hand through his hair and make sure he knows he’s loved, that he's worth everything in the world and more. all he wants is to sit there and just _listen_ to jackson, his voice, his laugh. to be in his presence always, to be  _with_ jackson always.

 

doesn’t know what to do when all jaebum wants is _jackson,_  and it’s impossible, like the moon falling in love with the sun.

  
no one ever writes stories about it, never thinks of it, it’s too much and never ends well and jaebum doesn’t know what to do except hide it as much as he can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm honestly sorry if this chapter made no sense ahhaha i have too many ideas at once and try to fit it into one big idea even though it makes no sense a lot of the time
> 
> aha i just kinda wrote what came to mind especially in the last sappy part


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sometimes even jaebum forgets, as much as he hates it, because he sees how much jackson anchors people and makes them happy.
> 
> forgets that jackson needs someone to anchor and make him happy too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> basically the first set of lyrics is jaebum's point of view and the second set is jackson's

_i will light up my heart,_

_i will burn it up for you_

 

 _you are my comfort, every day i pray i pray,_ _  
_

_you are my comfort zone above the sky_

 

 

jackson likes to think he's gotten good at hiding his feelings, covering up whenever he gets hurt by a joking comment or insult with his loud, always confident personality. hiding it when they unknowingly break down his confidence by putting up more of a front.

 

he likes to think that, but, now he’s not too sure. the joking comments are relentless, reaching his ears and burning into his mind, and he knows, he _knows_ , that they don’t mean any harm. it's all just for entertainment purposes, but he can’t help but feel the hurt stab at him, the pain settling in his heart. he slowly eases back, curling into a shell he rarely goes into, doesn’t even _want_ to go into, and he hopes the others don’t notice.

 

he thinks they don’t, by the way they keep talking with the same energy but he can never be too sure, knowing all too well of the skill all idols absolutely need: to be able to continue flawlessly no matter what happens on stage or in front of the camera. jackson isn’t quite sure he’s doing the best at that right now, something he usually always prides himself in.

 

jackson hopes it’s the former though, not wanting to burden his members. but jaebum notices, notices the small change in jackson, how he’s quieter and not as energetic but he can’t be sure, maybe jackson's just a bit tired.

 

jackson's quiet again during the car ride home, but no one really thinks anything of it, since they had schedules all day and are all tired. but when the group finally get back to their dorm and jackson immediately rushes to his room with hurried excuses thrown over his shoulder, a deep frown set on his face and the members are left in a concerned daze, jaebum certainly notices.

 

+

 

sometimes jackson is so bright and so loud that many people forget that he’s actually soft-hearted and insecure, easily hurt. that underneath that confident persona, he’s not that confident at all, needing constant reassurance and affection and attention for a reason.

 

sometimes even jaebum forgets, as much as he hates it, because he sees how much jackson anchors people and makes them happy. even if it’s at the cost of his own happiness. so even jaebum, the observant, caring leader of GOT7 forgets. forgets that jackson needs someone to anchor and make him happy too.

 

so jaebum mentally curses at himself for letting it slip his mind, thinking back to the interviews where the members all made joking remarks about each other, and maybe they did go _too_  far once or twice, but they're all good friends and know that they don't mean any actual harm.

 

but that doesn't mean it can't affect someone. hell, they affected even jaebum sometimes, when he decided to get better with his temper when the others constantly mentioned it. but the way they affected him was positive, him wanting to improve himself.

 

he starts walking to jackson and his room, saying he’s going to check on the blonde and leaves behind worried members.

 

when jaebum walks into the room, he sees jackson laying on his bed with his snapback covering his face.

 

jaebum moves to sit on the edge of the bed, making it dip under his weight but jackson doesn’t flinch. “jackson,” jaebum calls softly, but jackson still doesn’t move.

 

“jackson,” jaebum calls again, but more stern this time, adding just a bit of his natural leader tone he’s learned to perfect over the years of having to lead this uncontrollable mess of a group.

 

jackson finally rises to sit up, snapback falling into his lap. jaebum looks jackson in the eyes, hard and glistening with held back tears, his lips pulled into a thin line as he says a quiet, “what,” back. jaebum feels his heart ache and he feels his arms reach out to pull jackson into a hug before he can even properly think about what he’s even doing.

 

jaebum feels the younger’s body go stiff with surprise before he quickly slumps into the hug, hands coming up to grip the back of jaebum’s shirt and bury his head into jaebum’s shoulder. jaebum doesn’t hear or feel jackson cry, but he does shake and it just makes jaebum tighten his hold on the other’s waist, pulling him even closer.

 

“i’m going to say something completely out of character and i will kick your ass if you laugh at me about it later, so just listen,” jaebum says and he knows it comes out a bit too strongly but he knows that jackson knows it’s only out of fondness.

 

it’s silent for a moment, enough time for jaebum to collect his thoughts. he doesn’t know how to exactly start, searching desperately for the right thing to say, never being one to be good with conveying raw feelings but jackson needs it right now so he settles for, “you’re amazing,” and he feels the words start bubbling up, ready to spill. he lets them.

 

“you’re so, so amazing jackson. i’ve never met someone as hardworking as you, flying back and forth at dawn when the rest of us aren’t even awake yet to go film some side jobs and then coming back for our schedules,” jaebum feels jackson’s grip on his shirt tighten, probably stretching out the material but jaebum can’t bring himself to care right now as the other buries himself further into the older.

 

“i look at you and see you smile and i think of the sun, it’s so bright i think i might go blind sometimes, but i never want to turn away. you’re perfect in every which way and you are more than enough. you deserve the world jackson, you do. please never think you’re not enough or you’re not worth it, because you are and our team would never be the same without you. we all think so, the fans all think so. and if you ever think you’re alone, you’re not, we're here, GOT7 will always be here. to catch you when you fall.”

 

jaebum closes his eyes and rubs soothing circles into jackson’s lower back. he’s still quiet, but he’s stopped shaking and jaebum counts that for something. the next words that spill out, though, are ones jaebum never meant to say, at least not yet.

 

“and i’ll always be here because i love you.”

 

jaebum realizes what he said a heartbeat too late when he feels jackson go stiff again, eyes flying open, dread filling him and he kind of feels sick in his stomach. he tries to pull away to see jackson’s reaction and maybe try to save the situation and pass it off as purely friendly feelings (they are _far_ from just friendly).

 

but jackson’s grip on him keeps him from doing so, jackson never letting go, and maybe jaebum is imagining it but he thinks his grip might’ve gotten tighter if anything and he gets pulled back into the hug. jackson buries his head in jaebum's shoulder again having his head down the entire time so jaebum never has a chance to see his expression.

 

“don’t leave, idiot,” jackson mumbles against jaebum’s neck ( _stay here_ , he means) and jaebum chuckles as he feels jackson pout into his skin, all the uncertainty of jackson being uncomfortable and rejecting him slowly melting away.

 

“thanks,” jackson whispers and, “i love you, too,” after a heartbeat, and jaebum feels a small smile form on his face, rubs more circles into the blonde’s back.

 

“yea,” jaebum breathes and he feels jackson somehow tighten his grip impossibly tighter.

 

it’s silent for several moments, both wanting to experience this moment, comfortable and quiet and maybe comprehend that they both just confessed and it was requited before jaebum decides to dips his head down to whisper into jackson’s ear.

 

“i’ll have to move away if i want to kiss you,” he speaks in a low voice he knows fans swoon at and smirks in satisfaction when he sees the tips of jackson’s ears and back of his neck flush a light red.

 

jackson finally lifts his head and moves his hands to the front of jaebum’s shirt, pulling him in before jaebum can comprehend what’s happening and then he feels a pair of soft lips against his own, and now it's jaebum's turn to be surprised, and all his mind says is an unhelpful _oh_.

 

jaebum’s surprise quickly melts away as his arms snake around to hold jackson by the waist and he hums into the kiss, pulling jackson into his lap, jackson's arms moving up to wrap themselves around jaebum's neck. jaebum slowly licks his way into the younger’s mouth, keeping the kiss languid, not in a hurry and wanting to savor this moment.

 

jackson tastes sweet, not in a sugary, sickening way, but in a soft, gentle way, a way in which you’re not really sure if it’s there or not.

 

jackson pulls away to catch his breath, jaebum feeling it was all too short and he's very tempted to lean in and close the distance again (and maybe a few million more times).

 

but jackson gives jaebum a bright smile that could rival the sun itself (jaebum thinks jackson would win), eyes crinkling up into sweet crescents and jaebum forgets everything else except the beautiful man in front of him.

 

it warms jaebum in the chest, and he feels it spread, making his face flush and fingers tingle, sparks flying. his heart skips a beat and he feels it pick up speed, his mouth going dry all of a sudden and he licks his lips reflexively. he almost has to turn away because jackson’s smile is so bright and genuine he’s afraid he may actually go blind.

 

he doesn’t though, settles on gently taking jackson’s hand in his own and smiling back.

 

jackson laces their fingers together, smile broadening, and jaebum feels like he’s watching the sun rise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> was it too early for the confession scene? oh well and yea since jackbum confirmed that they share a room now (i literally died) i included it  
> also i really like the last line and it's been stuck in my head for a while and i hope the feeling and meaning i was trying to convey get's across  
> ALSO all the things jaebum said to jackson are basically the things i want to say to jackson and for him to know, this whole chapter is basically just my feelings towards jackson channeled through jaebum because jackson needs to know he deserves the entire world and should smile and be happy always  
> lmao this was the scene i thought of in math class that made me write this whole thing i mean i even wrote the first draft in my math notebook and i pray my teacher never checks


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jackson is a bit doubtful during the start of their relationship. to be honest, jaebum is too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> same as before, the first set of lyrics are from jaebum's point of view and the second set is jackson's
> 
> also this may be a bit exaggerated as usual but oh well
> 
> also i was gonna post this earlier but school and jaebum's injury hit me and the concert and him being at it and the members showing him so much love it makes me so emotional

_though our love is ordinary_

_the value is immeasurable you hear me?_

 

_don’t know what’s at the end until we get there_

_so don’t let go, hold on tight_

 

 

jackson is a bit doubtful during the start of their relationship. to be honest, jaebum is too, not knowing if this will last even though he wants it too, and not knowing if something can cause them to break up and ruin their friendship and teamwork in the process, or them being caught and it turning into a scandal, ruining their team but he likes to think he’s better at hiding it and pushing the negative thoughts away.

 

they don’t actively talk about it, both not wanting to think about the possible bad outcomes so early on but it’s inevitable to be a bit doubtful at the start of any relationship, right? except jackson and jaebum have so much at risk if they ever get caught or if their relationship turns sour and they break up on bad terms, their hypothetical breakup affecting the team.

 

jaebum doesn’t think about it, or at least tries to, so when jackson brings it up when they’re alone in the living room, the rest in their rooms or out, jaebum is more than a little surprised and scared.

 

jackson starts off slow, a hesitant, “hey,” and jaebum makes a grunt of acknowledgment.

 

jackson seems to have a hard time speaking before settling down, “do you ever, uh, wonder if this _thing_ we have is actually going to work out?”

 

uneasiness churns in jaebums stomach and he raises his head to face jackson, the other’s face in slight pain, like he doesn't want to talk about this but feels like he has to.

 

jaebum turns his body to fully face jackson, “what are you trying to say, jackson?” and jackson flinches, clearly uncomfortable, and jaebum knows what jackson’s implying he just wishes it wasn't that.

 

“i mean, what if this doesn’t work out? what if we, we break up and it ruins our team and it ruins _us_. what will we do? because normal couples can just never contact each other again but we can never do that. we’re idols, jaebum, and we’re in the same goddamn group,” jackson pauses in the middle of his rant to take a deep, shaky breath.

 

"or what if we get _caught_ jaebum? what will we do? we can’t just brush it off, we’re two guys dating it’ll be a huge scandal. what will the company and the rest of the members do? what will we do?" jackson raises his head to make eye contact with jaebum, voice becoming less and less steady, "i just, i just don’t know.”

 

jaebum stares at jackson for a while, his heart hurting. he takes a moment and then places his hand on jackson’s, “of course i've thought about it,” jaebum gives jackson a dry chuckle, “it’s kind of hard not to considering what we have at risk. but i also want this, _us_. and i know i’m probably being a horrible leader, doing this and putting the others at risk,” he stops to gather his thoughts and lets out a shaking breathy laugh which jackson returns.

 

"but what if we do work out and everything's fine? i know it's terrifying how much we have at stake if something goes wrong but we'll never know if we don't try and i want to at least try _us_  so please, jackson, have faith."

 

jaebum rubs circles into jackson's hand with his thumb as he sees the tension leave the other's shoulders and jackson’s face relaxes into an easy smile after a moment before saying, “yea, i will,” and jaebum pulls jackson in for a hug, the blonde sighing.

 

and jackson feels like home, like something worth it, someone he would fight the world for. he never thought in his entire life that he would meet anyone who would make him feel like this, jaebum always being someone to put his work first. but then he met jackson, and ironically, it was because of jaebum's work, and everything slowly changed. because jackson is someone who colored jaebum's dulling world. and now everything shines a bit brighter to jaebum. jaebum would now give anything to keep jackson in his life.

 

and jaebum believes every word he just said to jackson because they’re _them_ and they’re GOT7, a team that always makes it work no matter what, a team that’ll stay by each other’s side no matter what happens or what is thrown at them.

 

“it’ll work out, _we’ll_ work out. we always do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well this chapter came out of no where ahaha i just really wanted to write something based off those lyrics sorry if it seems out of place  
> but this chapter will probably be the end to the badly written angst so a lot of fluff later  
> i feel i exaggerated jaebums thing too much cause he obviously works hard at his job but oh well ahhh  
> also for the last line i kinda thought about jjp and how they got disbanded but then got to have a second chance with got7 and i think i'm gonna go cry now bye


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so when he sees jackson turn to him and smile back and place his hand over jaebum’s hand on his knee as he keeps talking, jaebum feels like he’s the luckiest person in the world.
> 
> he feels like he just seized the sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some badly written fluff since there was some badly written angst the past few chapters and guess what? jackson's compared to the sun once again ahaha i mean he is one of got7's sunshines the other being youngjae so

 

_fly, fly, our time is like sunshine after the rain,_

  
_fly, fly, shining brightly on you at the end of the tunnel_

 

  
jaebum turns slightly to jackson, resting a hand on his knee as jackson excitedly answers a question asked by the interviewer. jaebum knows he’s probably looking at the younger maybe a bit too fondly because they're in front of the camera but he can't seem to bring himself to care.

 

they might not even notice anything, pass it off as friendly skinship and move on. the members, however, have definitely noticed the shift in jaebum and jackson’s relationship, if the knowing looks and small teasing comments are anything to go by.

 

jinyoung and the maknaes especially say teasing comments here and there but jaebum’s not too sure that they have the right to say that, considering jinyoung and mark have been all over each other recently and yugyeom and bambam, well, they've been all over each other since day one.

 

but jaebum doesn't bite back, though, too happy right now to really care. and, secretly, the comments on how disgustingly romantic they’ve become makes him a bit _happy._

 

and the times when jaebum finds jackson under him, jaebum’s favorite place for jackson to be, with jaebum pinning the latter down as he kisses him breathless and he feels strong legs wrap around his waist and brings him closer,  _closer_ , jaebum certainly doesn't mind, not one bit. the teasing comments are more than bearable and even welcomed if jaebum gets to experience  _this._ the taste of jackson on his tongue and hear the breathy, soft moans. to be able to hold his hand and to be able to slip an arm around jackson's waist and pull him closer to jaebum.

 

jackson still has times where his insecurities and uncertainties eat away at him, leaving him curling into his shell. but now, jaebum is there to catch jackson when he falls, to coax him out, to reassure him that he’s _amazing and worth it and that he’s loved_ , with whispered words on quiet nights and delicate, gentle touches. 

 

so when he sees jackson turn to him and smile back and feels him place his hand over jaebum’s hand on his knee as he keeps talking, jaebum feels like he’s the luckiest person in the world.

 

and when jackson says a comment that has the whole group laughing, jaebum goes to place a fond hand on the back on jackson's neck. he keeps it there, curls his fingers slightly as they brush the hair on the back of the blonde's neck, jaebum casts his eyes downward and jaebum feels his grin get wider.

 

and maybe the camera catches it, maybe people may notice, the way his hand lingers and his expression enamored. but jaebum lets them, because jackson's eyes crinkle up more in a breathtaking smile when bambam adds another comment which has the members laughing harder, and jaebum almost forgets how to breathe.

  
jaebum feels his breathe stutter in his chest, almost like a hiccup, as he squeezes the back of jackson's neck. he feels like he just seized the sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was all over the place but then again when is it not ahaa
> 
> but on other news i'm kinda writing another jackbum fic? well i have like 5 other incomplete ideas but the other one i'm working on is cute so i'll try to not be lazy and finish it
> 
> ahaha i get inspiration for so many fanfics but i never have the dedication to write any of then out


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jaebum feels like everyday’s warm and the sun’s shining down on him everyday. _not literally_ , he thinks, as he looks out the car window at the gloomy sky.
> 
> but, as he turns back to face jackson who’s asleep on his shoulder and jaebum cards his fingers through the soft, blonde hair, he thinks, maybe he did mean it literally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> loOK WHOS BACK AT IT WITH COMPARING JACKSON TO THE SUN!! ME
> 
> also if this doesn't make sense the way i pictured it going was the middle part is jaebum kinda thinking back on all the times where that happened
> 
> also theres some making out but it's not that explicit so

_among the countless stars_

_you, you, you are in my arms_

 

 

jaebum feels like everyday’s warm and the sun’s shining down on him everyday. _not literally_ , he thinks, as he looks out the car window at the gloomy sky.

 

but, as he turns back to face jackson who’s peacefully asleep on his shoulder and jaebum cards his fingers through the soft, blonde hair, a small smile tugging at his lips, he thinks maybe he did mean it literally.

 

jaebum ignores the knowing looks jinyoung sends him in favor of watching jackson softly snore on his shoulder. jaebum’s glad jackson’s finally asleep, knowing that he’s been really busy lately, the younger always gone before him and the members even wake up and coming home at odd hours in the morning.

 

+

 

jaebum sometimes hears the clattering of jackson coming home at 2 am, always getting up to welcome his boyfriend back only to get shooed away and told to go back to sleep. jaebum always rolls his eyes and mumbles a sarcastic “ok mom” before he walks towards jackson and kisses the retorts right out of his mouth.

 

jaebum always feels himself smile in triumph when he feels jackson moan into the kiss, arms coming to wrap around jaebum’s neck as jaebum rests his hands on jackson’s hips. and he knows jackson’s forgotten about nagging jaebum to go to sleep, as jaebum slowly backs the younger into the wall, hands leaving jackson’s hips to place themselves on either side of jackson’s head on the wall, trapping him in.

 

he nips at the blonde’s lower lip and raises his leg to fit it in between those strong thighs jaebum loves so much, purposely brushing against jackson’s crotch and the other let’s out a breathy moan. jackson always turns into putty and his arms fall from jaebum’s neck and he quickly grips at the material on the front of jaebum’s shirt and jaebum knows he’s won.

 

jaebum always whispers in jackson's ear how much he loves the other man's thighs, height, body, personality,  _everything._ jaebum loves everything and anything about and that is jackson and he always makes sure to tell him that. he kisses the places that jackson feels most insecure about (though jaebum wonders how someone so wonderful and perfect in his eyes can feel so insecure about themselves).

 

he takes jackson apart slowly, piece by piece, with languid kisses and lingering touches. he always makes sure to appreciate everything that the other man is. he always feels jackson shiver and sigh and jaebum always falls in love just a little bit more.

 

of course jaebum never takes it further than that because he knows they always have schedules the next day and jackson and him both need rest. so he always waits for a better day to take it to the next level.

 

and he always feels his smile grow wider when he hears jackson’s breathy whine at the loss of contact and sees his swollen pink lips glisten with saliva, chocolate eyes glazed over. “come on, we have schedules tomorrow and we both need rest,” and jackson always nods and follows jaebum to their room, but not before muttering, “tease.” jaebum always chuckles and coaxes jackson into his open arms.

 

jackson always curls himself next to jaebum as jaebum wraps his arms around jackson's waist. jackson isn't much shorter than jaebum but the former always found a way to fold himself to fit against jaebum's chest just right. it makes jaebum's chest warm with affection.

 

he always whispers an "i love you" and doesn't fall asleep until jackson says it back. it never takes long.

 

+

 

jaebum smiles and buries his nose into the blonde hair, pressing a soft kiss into the crown of jackson’s head, still ignoring the giggles and fake gag noises from the others, _what a bunch of dickbags_ , and breathes jackson in.

 

he feels jackson rouse and lifts his head, watching the blonde rubbing sleep out of his eyes and fondness blooms in his chest. for all the hype of jackson’s “wild and sexy” image, the other is quite the opposite, naturally having a cute personality. it's lovely.

 

jackson smiles at jaebum, still drowsy with sleep, whispering, “good morning.” jaebum smiles back, chuckling a bit because it’s certainly not morning, but he still whispers a “good morning,” back.

 

and suddenly the coughs and gagging noises are very prominent and jaebum is very aware of his surroundings. he feels heat rise to his cheeks, glancing around finally, and realizing all eyes are watching them, over phones and through window reflections, with knowing looks in their eyes.

 

he turns away and looks out the window, trying to hide his embarrassment. it almost works, _almost_ , and then jaebum feels jackson’s head fall onto his shoulder once more and he feels the younger nuzzle into his neck and hum in contentment and the heat rushes to jaebum’s face again and jaebum feels himself smile despite himself.

 

 _crap,_ jaebum curses, _i’m so whipped._

 

jaebum steals a glance at jackson and finds the other man scrolling on his phone, a smirk playing at his lips and jaebum _knows_ that jackson knows how flustered he’s making jaebum right now. _what a great boyfriend he is_. but jaebum feels the corners of his mouth tug up into a wider smile as he closes his eyes and presses another kiss on the crown of jackson’s head, feeling the soft hair against his lips. he lazily opens an eye and sees the smirk disappear off jackson’s face and a light blush takes it’s place.

 

now it’s jaebum’s turn to smirk, the other members and his surroundings completely forgotten, as he stays there, breathing in jackson’s scent and wrapping a loose arm around jackson’s waist and the embarrassment melting away, and feelings of fondness takes it’s place.

 

because sometimes jaebum stops and thinks about how jackson could be anywhere but here, with anyone other than jaebum. jaebum could’ve never met jackson. jackson could've never been in jaebum's life, or not be in GOT7, or maybe just not _here,_  loving jaebum and letting jaebum love him. there could be so many possibilitiesandyet here he is, in jaebum's arms.

 

jaebum rarely does these things in public or around the other members, but right now he can’t really care because he feels love bloom in his chest. and jackson is right here, next to jaebum, grounding him. he feels like home, comfort, and something that is just undeniably _jackson_ that jaebum absolutely loves _._  jaebum just wants to savor the moment so he just breathes in that gentle scent and he feels himself slowly drifting off.

 

he dreams of soft, blonde hair, deep brown eyes, and a smile like the sun. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhh one more chapter after this probably, aahah i feel like this story was more like a bunch of vaguely related drabbles and not an actually full story but oh well
> 
> sorry if this kinda didnt make sense but i just wrote what came to me ahah


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so jaebum leans in to catch jackson’s lips again, and maybe find some air in jackson to breathe and jaebum swears that his smile tastes like the sun. bright, shining, and absolutely beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the last in this mess of a story

_aye, are you happy? i sure am, yeah_ _  
_

_every morning i wake up it feels like a dream_ _  
_

_like the brilliant sun is shining just for me_ _  
_

_today, like always, my day starts with you_

 

 

it’s a glorious day off free of schedules and everyone in the dorm takes it as an opportunity to sleep in.

 

of course that includes jaebum and jackson, all soft snores and edging closer. gentle and warm.

 

jaebum wakes up when the sun filters through the blinds and everything's too bright to keep sleeping.

 

jaebum starts to reach around blindly to try and find his phone and check the time but stops when he feels a body on him. jackson.

 

the blonde is still asleep and cuddled up into jaebum’s chest, head buried into jaebum’s neck. their legs are a tangle of limbs that jaebum's too tired to figure out right now and jaebum feels the fondness in his chest take form of a smile on his face.

 

jaebum gives up his search for his phone in favor of burying his nose in the blonde hair and breathing jackson in, wrapping an arm around the shorter one’s waist.

 

jaebum considers falling asleep again, maybe pull the blankets over his head to block out the sun, and he almost does. but then he hears footsteps and voices and knows the other members are all starting to wake, so he decides against it.

 

he lays there for a few more moments before planting kisses along the crown of jackson’s head and the other stirs. this was always jaebum's favorite way of waking the other up.

 

jackson lifts his head from jaebum’s shoulder and reaches a hand up to rub sleep out of his eyes and gives jaebum a tired smile. jaebum smiles back, pecking jackson on the lips before moving to rest on his elbows and forearms.

 

jaebum untangles their legs and removes his arm from jackson’s waist to sit up, jackson rolling to the side and off jaebum, still laying on the matress. he searches for a shirt and pulls it over his head and glances at jackson. jackson’s still laying there and staring up at jaebum, and it gives jaebum a boost in his confidence knowing jackson probably traced all of jaebum's moves when he put his shirt on.

 

“i know you like what you see but we have to get up and make sure the others don’t burn the house down trying to make breakfast,” jaebum smirks and jackson flushes red and immediately sitting up and moves from next to jaebum.

 

jackson grabs a random shirt and smacks jaebum with it, resulting in jaebum letting out a laugh, before tugging it on. jaebum recognizes the shirt is actually his but he doesn’t comment on it, not wanting jackson to take it off. he feels affection bloom when he sees jackson in his shirt, it being slightly big on the latter.

 

jackson moves to open the door and leave but jaebum catches his wrist and pulls the younger back down. jackson yelps in surprise before landing ungracefully in jaebum’s lap, head bumping into jaebum’s chest and hands reflexively grabbing onto the front of jaebum’s shirt as jaebum wraps his arms around jackson’s waist.

 

“what the hell, hyung,” jackson says and lifts his head from jaebum’s chest to glare at the brunette.

 

"i love you," jaebum says with a smile. he sees a faint blush color jackson's cheeks as the other still glares at the older.

 

"i mean i guess you're ok," jackson pouts.

 

jaebum just let’s out another chuckle before he closes his eyes and leans in to lick the rest of the snarky comments he’s sure would have left jackson’s tongue right out. so he had decided to put that tongue to a better use.

 

jaebum hums into the kiss and jackson huddles a bit closer. this is what they are, push and pull. jaebum pulls away when they both are in need of air and rests his forehead against jackson's, taking in a deep breath. jackson slowly opens his eyes and looks at jaebum, brown melding into brown.

 

"i love you," jaebum breathes out, but this time it's a whisper, almost like if he spoke too loudly everything would be broken and he'll wake up realizing it's all been just a dream. a terribly amazing dream.

 

but this time jackson whispers, "i love you," back and jaebum knows for sure this is reality. knows that the skin underneath his fingertips is real and those lips he touched are real, and the world sinks in. it grounds him and makes him pull the blonde a little bit closer. jaebum feels a chuckle bubble up in his chest and he lets it out, jackson doing the same.

 

and jackson's dark eyelashes cast shadows onto his cheeks and his smile grows wider as the sun rises further. his eyes turn into delicate crescents, softened by eyelashes and resembling the sunrise. his blonde hair glows in the morning light and jaebum feels himself go a breathless, his lungs giving out. _beautiful_.

 

so jaebum leans in to catch jackson’s lips again, and maybe find some air in jackson to breathe and jaebum swears that his smile tastes like the sun. bright, shining, and absolutely beautiful.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look i know morning breath is a thing but pretend it isn't ok
> 
> anyways thank you for reading this til the end and i hope the plotlessness and choppiness and bad transitions and all the comparisons of jackson to the sun wasn't too much aha
> 
> so i'll see you guys the next time i can get my lazy ass up to actually write and edit another fic

**Author's Note:**

> hi ahah i don't know what this is except a self indulgent fic i thought of in the middle of class (don't follow my steps kids i'm a horrible student) and i'm pretty sure the chapters don't transition well so :/
> 
> i'll probably crosspost onto aff but probably after i finish it


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